I used to dislike numbers and didn’t understand complex financial terms, nor was I the type of person who paid much attention to material things. That’s why I was even surprised by the change in my perception and enthusiasm towards personal finance. Looking back on my journey (which has just begun) in this new field, I realize that learning financial management has changed my life in many aspects, including those not directly related to money.

Meanwhile, most literature on this topic tends to focus on numbers (income, expenses, savings, investments…) or the ultimate goal of money (financial independence, prosperity), but rarely discusses the process of changing one’s mindset and perception when they start paying more attention to their spending habits. This is a significant omission, because it is these small but important lessons that help people recognize their positive daily changes and gain motivation to manage their expenses better. Therefore, this article highlights the 5 biggest changes I’ve experienced from learning personal financial management.

I hope it can inspire you to take control of your finances, no matter where you are on the scale of “financial freedom”.

1. ENJOY ABSOLUTE FREEDOM WITHIN FRAMEWORK

In the first class of high school, when talking about the rules of the new school year, my class teacher mentioned a sentence that seemed very contradictory: “Discipline is freedom.” For many years later, I contemplated that saying and tried to apply it to work and life; But it wasn’t until I started managing my personal finances more closely that I fully understood the meaning and “power” of this statement.

Before, I used to think that if I had a lot of money to buy whatever I wanted, without looking at the price, without thinking, I would be completely free. But the truth is exactly the opposite, the more money I make, the more I find myself needing to spend more money. Instead of freely spending the money I earn, I feel like money is getting tighter and tighter, causing me more stress when shopping, especially in the last weeks of the month. In addition to feeling constrained by money, I also felt helpless because I lost control and direction—not knowing where the money I made went. Along with that comes feelings of guilt, self-blame, and shame when sharing with others about money-related issues.

But since I put freedom into perspective by creating a spending plan (based on a zero-based budget) and following it closely from the beginning to the end of the month, I feel completely free with my money. money I make. Now, with a spending plan in place, I can buy whatever I want, as long as it’s within my monthly budget. (The most surprising thing is that this level of regulation not only does not cause a feeling of tightness or suffocation, but also makes money seem to “expand” more than before, allowing for more useful expenses to be spent).

And because I spend responsibly, I no longer feel guilty or ashamed when shopping for what I consider necessary. In particular, to further expand the freedom gap within the family’s framework and budget, my husband and I each have an amount called “Fun Money”. This money can be spent on anything you like without having to discuss it in the family first, and never being judged—no matter how wasteful or silly it may be; Because money, after all, is just to make our lives more “fun”.

It is the freedom within this framework that allows me to comfortably spend without having to worry that my decisions today may affect future savings and investment plans. any. Everything has been carefully calculated from the beginning. Contrary to what many people think that financial management is tiring, stuffy, and annoying, I always feel happy when I learn new things about money and the more I know, i feel more and more “untied”. Discipline, truly, is freedom!

2. BUILD A MORE TRUST AND STRONG RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR LIFE PARTNER

I notice that most couples around me manage money in the following way: the husband brings his salary home to the wife, who is “in charge of the key box”, and the wife is responsible for spending everything in the house. With this method, money is transferred to a very easy-to-control relationship. However, because there is only one person holding the money, the wife often has to carry too much responsibility for spending and accounting; It’s okay if it’s enough, but whenever there’s a “shortage first, there’s a shortage later” it’s difficult to share with the husband because the husband thinks that all the money he makes has been given to his wife and that means he’s no longer responsible. Therefore, the husband automatically considers that the money he earns is enough for family expenses and has little motivation to earn more money to help the family in times of need (unless you have to listen to your wife nagging and whining all day about money).

Personally, I feel like I’m not suited to this type of money management because I’m not the type of wife who can follow behind her husband to pay him money, then give him “pocket money” back, and then “check it out.” “fish sauce, counting onions and pickles” every month to see if I have any extra money to put away. Therefore, when I first got married, I decided to manage money in the completely opposite way, that is, the money that each person spends and contributes to the family is divided equally. Even when there is a joint account in both husband and wife’s names, I still insist on dividing it equally and spending separately.

After a few years, I realized that this seemingly modern way of managing money has just as many limitations as the traditional way. Firstly, with this way of dividing money separately, the money does not converge into one relationship, making it difficult to control how much the couple’s total income is, how much is the total monthly expense, and to set aside a savings for the family. family for future plans. Second, separating expenses also makes discussions about money between husband and wife increasingly rare. Gradually, money also becomes a sensitive topic because one person spends this and the other disagrees but may not dare to speak up because “your money” and “my money” are separate.

Since I started learning money management, I, or rather, my husband and I, started to change our concepts, how we ask questions, and manage the money we make. We decided to combine both modernity and tradition by putting all the money into one account (both husband and wife’s salary goes into a joint account, under both names, and both can use it) but the wife The husband also participates in making a monthly spending plan, uses the same phone app to track spending, and has a separate consumer/cash card from the above joint account. This ensures that both jointly and privately, both people are responsible and have equal understanding of family spending, everything is transparent and clear. Of course, because in a relationship, each person has their own strengths and weaknesses, so the division of responsibilities is not necessarily 50-50. For example, a wife who is more meticulous and goes to the market more often will have to monitor money more closely and have more responsibilities than her husband; But because the husband also participates in planning expenses and regularly monitors the flow of money in and out, the husband also knows his wife’s difficulties when shopping for the family and is motivated to work harder to help pay for the expenses. Family spending is more comfortable.

Since changing the way we manage money, we both feel that daily communication between husband and wife (not just about money) is more open. Sharing the financial burden also gives us more motivation to solve daily problems together, plan for the future together, and trust each other more when facing important decisions. important. Therefore, if we had a time machine to go back to the first year of marriage, we would definitely take a course together on family money management, read books together and learn information about finances, and get along. Best to spend sooner. I believe that this is not only good for family finances but also improves the couple’s relationship in a profound and sustainable way.

3. BECOMING MORE CLARIFIED AND MATURING FURTHER

The most amazing thing about financial management is that once you start paying closer attention to the money you make, you will also become more discerning in other aspects of your life—because just about everything in life are all related to money. This is something that not only me, but many people who have pursued the path of financial independence have the same opinion: Learning to manage money makes us more mature.

Before, when I wasn’t really close to money, I often wasted little everyday things, thinking it wasn’t really important. Excess food, household waste, environmentally harmful plastic, “instant fashion”, unethical brands… for example—before, I didn’t really pay attention to them. But since I have stricter control over my money, I have become more appreciative of the money I make. I want my hard-earned money to be spent on useful things, not wasteful, not harmful to the health of myself and the community. I also want to use my money to support brands that are responsible to nature, to workers, and to the quality of the products they make. Therefore, financial management makes me a “wise consumer”, more discerning and more mature with my spending decisions, even the smallest ones.

Learning financial management also makes me more comfortable talking with others about money, instead of considering it a sensitive topic. Being open in communication and regularly asking questions about finances has helped me have more positive relationships with people in the same situation and with the same mindset about money management.

4. BE MORE DETERMINED WITH YOUR DREAMS

I have many dreams and plans for the future. But almost every dream involves money, even a lot of money to make it happen. Before, every time I thought about this issue, I just wanted to sigh and give up. Later, inspired by Lisa Nichols’ story, a single African American mother who worked tirelessly to send a check to the bank every week with the note “Investment for my dream”, I also started setting aside a separate fund for my own dreams.

When each investment and each future plan is associated with a monetary value, it appears much more clearly and realistically. Instead of feeling like I’m just daydreaming, I know what I’m doing every day to lay the foundation for making my dreams come true. And this makes me more determined and motivated to realize my dream. Even though it’s just in the early stages, I’m happy to tell you that next year you’ll see more of the personal projects I’ve been working on. It’s true that every dream has its “price”, but I believe that I can start planning, calculating, and “paying” for it right now.

5. BE GENEROUS TO EVERYONE AND APPRECIATE MORE WHAT YOU HAVE

Contrary to many people’s thinking that saving is associated with being stingy and miserly. From my own journey, I realize that: the better I control the money I earn, the more I appreciate what I have, the less I’ll be dissatisfied, and the more generous I’ll be with others. In the past, I often felt short of money and giving money to charity or giving back to the community was sometimes difficult and forced. But since I regained control over my money, I realized that I am truly full (within my scope). And even though there are many things that require money, we can still contribute to charity and the community by volunteering (donating time and effort) or donating unnecessary household items. to those in need. I also open small “classes” in my group of friends to share information about finance and savings that I have learned from books and the media. Even writing sharing articles like this is also a way I choose to share my knowledge with the community.

For me, understanding more about money management (not necessarily making more money) makes life a lot easier.

It helps us feel more confident and more confident to look into the hidden corners of our lives that we were afraid of and afraid to touch before. I will continue on my journey to financial independence, although the road is still very long, I am really proud and happy when thinking about the positive changes I have had. I hope that you too have been on your own path.

Financial management is truly for EVERYONE, not just for businesspeople, those with a lot of money, or those who are stingy and miserly… Anyone among us can learn something new when we take a closer look at the money we currently have in hand.